Henri le chat noir: the existential sellout

Secret Fatty has long maintained a strict policy with regards to advertising and sponsorship deals, turning down several hundred lucrative offers a day as befits a website that prides itself on its complete independence and commitment to journalistic integrity.

Thus with a firm footing in the moral high-ground, SIF has no qualms about acting as whistleblower when confronted with the moral failings of others. First by charting the downfall of one young woman from instagrammed haul-blogger to l'Oreal sellout, and now with the sad case of Henri Le Chat Noir.

It is now known that Henri, who previously distinguished himself from the hoi polo of YouTube oversharers through his familiarity with Kierkegaard, command of the French language and possession of a tail, recently accepted an offer from Friskies to become an official spokescat. While it could only be expected that such a bleak soul would eventually come cheap, SIF is disappointed to see Henri, purportedly a campaigner for the rights of disabused cats everywhere, hawking a product that according to reliable sources is more or less a nutritional equivalent of McDonalds.

No (French) revolution can be fought on an empty stomach and even less so a malnourished one. We can only hope that Henri will soon go back to recommending a more usual feline diet of lassitude, self-absorption and shoelaces.

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